Top 10 Ways to Scare Your Product Manager this Halloween
In the spirit of Halloween we asked our community of Product Managers on Slack (you have joined our slack chat for product managers right?) what would scare them the most. Predictably, the results were hilarious:
1. Book a roadmap planning session full of HiPPOs.
2. “Can you prepare a Gantt chart for next year? With every dependency linked.”
Davide Scalzo & Josh Harris
3. “You know this project we just finished? We need to rebuild it from scratch.”
Simon Cast & Cyril Leroux
4. When someone from customer service comes over and says “I just got off the phone to a customer…”
5. “I don’t agree with the user research, we should just do it my way.”
6. When the project you’ve spent the last three months getting ready with the team and is due to start tomorrow has just been de-prioritized by the CEO in favour of this great new idea he heard about at a conference this weekend. While drunk.
7. When you realise that the product you’ve just finished doesn’t actually solve anyone’s problem and now you have to tell the CEO.
8. When Sales saunter over and demand a feature that you’ve never heard of and isn’t even on the roadmap “or our biggest client is going to walk”.
9. When you find out your product has a launch date by reading the news.
10. When your new boss turns out to be Bruce Willis and he just keeps whispering “I see dead features”.
Dominic Mason & James Mayes
and because Product Managers always turn it up to 11:
11. Two words: Legacy. System.
and a bonus Dilbert to brighten your day: